SB.. Oprah Winfrey Opens Up About Her Complicated Relationship With Her Late Mother Vernita Lee

Oprah Winfrey is widely known as one of the most influential figures in television history — a talk show host, producer, author, and philanthropist who has inspired millions around the globe. Yet, behind her remarkable success, there is a deeply personal story of resilience shaped by a complex relationship with her late mother, Vernita Lee.

Vernita Lee was born in 1935 in Mississippi, a time and place marked by deep racial segregation. She became a mother at just 18 years old, giving birth to Oprah in 1954. Life for a young African American woman in the segregated South was extremely challenging, and Vernita worked hard to provide for her daughter despite limited opportunities.

Childhood Years Spent Apart

Oprah spent much of her early childhood living with her grandmother, Hattie Mae Lee, while her mother worked as a maid in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Hattie Mae played a critical role in shaping Oprah’s future, introducing her to reading, storytelling, and public speaking — skills that would one day define her career.

When Oprah was six years old, she reunited with her mother in Milwaukee. The years that followed were not easy. Moving between her mother’s home in Milwaukee and her father Vernon Winfrey’s home in Nashville created instability. Oprah faced several hardships during her youth, including childhood abuse and the devastating loss of a child shortly after birth — experiences that she rarely spoke about in her early career.

Lessons From Family and Mentors

Despite these early struggles, Oprah drew strength and wisdom from multiple influences in her life. Her grandmother encouraged her love of learning. Her father instilled discipline and a strong work ethic. Later, legendary poet and activist Maya Angelou became one of Oprah’s most cherished mentors, helping her navigate the pressures of fame and personal growth.

Oprah made the personal decision not to have children of her own, instead devoting herself to mentoring and uplifting others. She founded the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa, where she has played a maternal role for hundreds of young women, offering education, guidance, and life opportunities.

Emotional Reflections on Motherhood

In a conversation with Dr. Bruce Perry, a psychiatrist and childhood trauma expert, Oprah shared intimate memories about her relationship with her mother. During a group discussion, others recalled moments when their mothers lovingly prepared meals, cared for them during rainy days, or offered daily affection. Oprah realized she had very few such memories with Vernita.

Despite the absence of these traditional mother-daughter moments, Oprah expressed gratitude for her mother’s decision to bring her into the world and acknowledged that Vernita did the best she could with the circumstances she faced. She emphasized the importance of acceptance — recognizing that we cannot rewrite the past, but we can choose how to move forward with understanding and peace.

This acceptance allowed Oprah to heal and to inspire others who may also have complicated family histories. Her openness encouraged listeners to reflect on their own relationships and find ways to honor the efforts of their parents, even if those relationships were imperfect.

Vernita Lee’s Legacy

Vernita Lee passed away on Thanksgiving Day in 2018 at the age of 83. Though her relationship with Oprah had its challenges, Vernita’s determination and perseverance left a lasting impact. She raised a daughter who would go on to break barriers in media, champion social causes, and become a voice of empowerment for millions worldwide.

Oprah has often acknowledged that her mother’s resilience — even in the face of hardship — was a significant influence on her own drive to succeed. Their story is a reminder that complex relationships can still shape greatness and that love sometimes shows itself in ways we do not immediately recognize.

A Story That Resonates

Oprah’s candid reflections resonate with many who have experienced complicated family dynamics. Her journey shows that it is possible to find peace through understanding and gratitude, even when the past includes pain or distance.

The lessons from Oprah’s life are not only about personal success but also about emotional growth — learning to reconcile with one’s history, to accept loved ones as they are, and to transform hardship into motivation.

For Oprah, her mother’s story is forever intertwined with her own. While Vernita Lee may not have been the traditional nurturing figure that many imagine, she gave Oprah life, and in doing so, set in motion a path that would inspire generations.

Continuing to Inspire

Today, Oprah Winfrey continues to share her experiences openly, using her platform to help others heal from their own struggles. Through her interviews, books, and philanthropic work, she encourages people to embrace authenticity, forgive where possible, and honor the people who shaped them — for better or worse.

Her ability to speak honestly about her challenges, while maintaining compassion and grace, has only strengthened her connection with audiences worldwide. Oprah’s story with her mother serves as both a personal memoir and a universal reminder: even in difficult relationships, there can be lessons that guide us toward becoming our best selves.